Daycare vs Mama Bear

Our daughter was placed in an in-home daycare when she was 12 weeks until about two weeks ago. Let’s say the woman in charge’s name is Maleficent. We met with her while I was pregnant. Her home was set up beautifully– like it was meant to be a daycare. She had a nice carpet, games,…

Experienced Moms vs New Moms

You know that guy in your office who has been there for years, got a great education, has done really well, but refuses to accept new ideas because he “knows it all”? Any time you, the newcomer, suggests changes, he scoffs, pats you on the head, and says, “Oh, honey. You’ll learn.” That’s how I…

Attrition vs Appeasement 

In certain situations, mothers stand alone against a sea of stupidity. I’m talking unwanted advice, idiotic interrogations, or unnecessary beratements (beration? Beratings? Wtf is the noun form of berate?) that we all receive. I have a few such incidents which occurred to me over the weekend. In my last post, I recounted the story of flying…

Driving vs Flying

There once was a tale of a people just trying to survive with their families in a poor town. This evil man comes into town and steals money from the townspeople claiming they owe more and more! The people wait and wait for a hero to show up when finally, their hero comes and steals…

Blog Recognition

  Thank you so much I’m Sick and So Are You for nominating me for the Blog Recognition Award! In my brief time of spilling out the hysterics of being a mom, I really appreciate the recognition. Honestly, if constantly getting spit upon by my mockingly angelic child means other bloggers think I do okay, I’ll continue…

Staying In vs Going Out

Your child is a beacon of holiness hand-delivered to you by a choir of little, chubby, creeplily winged babies. As they hand over your own little cherub, those flying miniature Michelins sing songs filled with such beauty, such melody, your heart instantly fills with what can only be described as ethereal love. That’s why I…

Too Prepared Diaper Bag vs Not Prepared Enough Diaper Bag

Really, there is no in-between, is there? You have either prepared way too much or way too little. I know what you’re thinking: this is not one of those baby issues I’m overly concerned about. Nor should you be. Let’s just take a look at what happens when you do either, because remember, you really…

Breastfeeding vs Formula

“So, you’re going to breastfeed, right?”  Ah, the inevitable question all pregnant women receive when they share their good news . It’s not like you have enough to worry about, being pregnant and all. No, choosing the right OB, the numerous doctor’s appointments, pre-natal vitamins, maternity clothes, maternity leave, procuring baby items, naming the baby,…

Co-sleeping vs Crib

I have created a melancholy, isolated environment for my child, a setting which seems eerily similar to the moors in Wuthering Heights. My precious, innocent angel has been denied compassion and empathy, and most importantly, love. How have I stolen her childhood, you ask? By having her sleep in a crib. My husband and I…